We just returned from a week in beautiful and sunny Play del Carmen, Mexico. You may be raising your eyebrows thinking "you took two 5-month-old babies to Mexico?!" I know, it sounds crazy. But we went with Russ's family as a celebration of my wonderful mother-in-law's 60th birthday in her home country. :) We felt so blessed to be able to go, and how do you turn down a trip to Mexico? Needless to say, having the twins made pretty much everything more difficult, but it was still a lovely week in a warm and tropical location!

Clara and Max, lounging poolside with their beverage of choice. :)

Just for the record, this is one of my new favorite pictures of all time.

Clara with her Aunts Marcella and Natalie and adoring cousin Lucy. 

Hangin' with my girl.

The birthday girl and two of her grandsons (Benny and Max). This picture just exudes happiness. Max was hamming it up. I love his little face.

Both babies swam for the first time. Max was really unsure about the whole ordeal. He had this face pretty much the whole time we had him near the water. Hopefully he warms up to the idea for this summer. :)

Max and Russ chillin' at the pool. I love his belly and low-riding swimsuit. Haha.

I mean, look at those faces.

Our little family of 4!

Laying in the hammock was probably one of my biggest highlights of the trip. So relaxing. I love how relaxed my two men look in the picture. 

One day we left the resort and went to a place called Xel-Ha, which was a fun park where you could zip-line, snorkel, swim with dolphins, etc. It was gorgeous.

We were very ready to come home and get these babies back to their schedule (it's crazy how much they get messed up when they leave their routine), but dang, I already miss that beautiful weather and scenery Mexico has to offer! Thanks again to Russ's parents for that amazing trip of a lifetime!

5 Months!

Just for tradition sake, I need to document the babies turning 5 months! I'm probably sounding like a broken record, but I really can't believe how fast time is flying. I also know pretty much every mom says this, but I am loving each and every new phase we hit. Right now Max and Clara are sooo much fun. They smile, chuckle, and coo all day long. Ok, maybe not all day (no one likes exaggerating), but they really are extremely happy babies. Sleeping through the night has done wonders to all of our lives. Neither one has rolled over or sat up on their own, but I think we are close. :) I love my babies so very much. We are almost to half a year! Eek!

As I've mentioned before, it is extremely difficult to get TWO babies smiling at the same time! The picture after this had Max smiling, but I liked this one because it shows how they always reach out to each other and hold hands/arms. It melts my heart!

Nothing Is More Important

I heard about this article from my friend Rachel. When I first started reading the article I thought it was a joke. And then when I realized that this girl was so blatantly hating on any woman who wants to be a wife and mother, I felt incredibly sorry for her. Obviously everyone has their different time tables and may be waiting for one or both of these things to come to pass, but to demean such a righteous endeavor with hate and ignorance was shocking. 

Being a wife is such an honor. I can't imagine navigating this life without Russ by my side. And then to be a mother. Geez. Obviously I'm newer to this category, but I literally feel as though my heart has been split into three. 

I read the article last night and couldn't stop thinking about it all day. As I was lathering my babies with moisturizer on the changing table, I kept thinking "nothing is more important than this." Nurturing, comforting and raising these perfect little babies is the most important thing I have ever done. I really am so grateful for this opportunity to mother Max and Clara.  

I'm obsessed with their little feet! They are so cute and chubby. Clara has recently found her feet and is always holding them when she's laying down. It's so dang cute.

By the way, I need to document the fact that we hit a huge milestone a few weeks ago. After 4 months of extreme sleep deprivation (I'm talking getting up 5-6 times a night consistently), Russ and I were desperate enough to make these babies cry-it-out. We had a few incredibly miserable nights, but it paid off! They slept through the night and haven't really gone back! WOOT! Occasionally we will hear them wake up, but they always put themselves back to sleep. Clara has especially loved the schedule and now sleeps a little over 12 hours every night. Oh sleep, we have all missed you. Welcome back! (and please stay?!)

All In a Years' Time

I fear that this blog has quickly become a "twin overload" picture montage. I would apologize, but I'm not really that sorry! These little people have stolen our hearts and also all of our attention. :) I wouldn't have it any other way. 

This last weekend, Valentine's weekend, Russ and I kept reflecting on how much has changed since last Valentine's day. Last year at this time we were knee-deep in IVF treatments with shots and appointments galore. In fact, we had tried to escape the stress of it all by going on a little "stay-cation," but that weekend was also a major bust. It was the first night of a new shot which Russ had to administer in my butt. Long story short, there was blood and tears and a ruined weekend. Ha ha. Oh what a difference a year makes. This year my aunt was kind enough to stay with the twins as we had a casual evening to dinner and a movie. Not surprisingly, we couldn't wait to come home to our two little babies. 

On Presidents day we had the twins' 4-month appointments. Wow! I can't believe they are that old. Both twins were in the 90th percentile for height and head circumference (no surprise there), and about the 50th percentile for weight. 4 months down, eternity to go!

This picture melts my heart.

Clara loves her little doggy. Clara is such a content and happy little girl. She makes you earn her smiles and they are near impossible to capture on camera :)

Max loves balloons. Russ got a balloon for his birthday in January and it is still bringing smiles!

This little boy is so happy. He makes me smile.

We're Growing!

The twins are 4 months today! Holy shmoly. Max and Clara are changing every day. I love watching as new discoveries are made - like hands! Hands are so fun! Sometimes Max tries to eat both hands at once (highly unsuccessful), and Clara will stick her little fingers so far in her mouth she gags herself. It's funny and sad. This morning we had our first big parent fail. Russ left Clara on the rocking chair and looked away. Next thing he heard was a "thud" and poor little Clara on the floor! Ah! Luckily she is just fine, but lesson learned - we cannot expect them to stay where they are anymore!

We think Clara will be the first to move. Mr. Max is quite content sitting and watching what's going on. Clara is wanting to sit up. She loves tummy time. She squirms and wiggles. It won't be long now. 

This is one of my favorite faces she makes, as she is trying so hard to keep that head up. {heart melter}

 

Tummy time isn't so bad (for her... Max isn't as big of a fan)

Playing together!

Ups and Downs

This picture was one of the few things that kept me keepin' on this week! Sounds dramatic, I know. But quite honestly it has been a ROUGH few weeks. But we survived.

Russ has been traveling with work. I've been on dual baby duty day and night, which is nothing short of exhausting by myself. I got really sick. The babies got really sick. Max had an ear infection. Sleep has been lacking (ha... understatement).

Despite the whining above (hey, it's my blog, right?), I also had some really cool experiences. Last Sunday Russ left town at 3 pm and by 3:30 both babies were screaming and I could not get them to calm down. After 3 or 4 hours of struggling, I finally called my neighbor and good friend to ask if she could come hold a baby. She was over in 2 minutes. After we got them both to sleep, she then told me she was coming back and was spending the night and taking care of all of the shifts. Seriously?! She wouldn't back down. I decided to accept the help. It's something I'm working on. I know people want to help, and I know I need it. Like when another friend brought me old fashioned doughnuts and Diet Coke. Ummm, thank you.

So yes, it's been a bit rough lately. But it's also been so incredibly humbling and heart-warming to know that so many people care. I am blessed!

The Sleeper Series

Max and Clara were wearing coordinating sleepers a few weeks ago, so of course I had to capitalize on the opportunity and get some pictures! I love them so much.

Max: Dad! You are so funny! Tell me more!

Clara:  Bring it on. We'll see if this makes me laugh.

Max: That guy with the poofy black hair is kind of weird...

Clara: Really, dad?

Max: He's pretty funny, I guess. I like him.

Clara: He's STILL going!

Max: Ok, this guy is AWESOME! I'm so glad he's my Dad.

Clara: ....

Max: HAHAHA!! 

Clara: Ok, ok, he's got skills!

Max: I could watch him all night long. Seriously, keep going!

Clara: I've lost interest. Is there some milk around these parts?

Both: Can we help you, Mom? 

Both: Ok, you make our food. We'll give you some cute puppy dog eyes. 

January Has Been Busy

At the beginning of January my little brother got married! It was such a happy, happy day. I love seeing Jace so happy, and it doesn't hurt that the girl he married is awesome. Seriously, I couldn't be happier to have Bella as my new sister-in-law. 

A few days after the wedding the twins and I hopped in the car with my parents for a Pacific Northwest getaway. I loved growing up in Spokane, WA and it's always good to go back. I don't know if I'll ever live in Washington again, but it will always hold a special place in my heart. Russ was able to come up for about a week as well. We ended the trip with a short stint in Seattle. These twins of ours are now pretty well traveled for being a measly 3 months, but dang, Russ and I were humbled big-time in Seattle. Two screaming babies in a foreign city is no fun. Needless to say, a lot of Saturday night was spent in the hotel. Sigh. Sunday we went to Bellevue and gorgeous Lake Washington where Russ's dad grew up. It was the perfect end to my two-week stay in Washington. 

* I also got to spend some time with Rachel, who is one of those friends - you know, the kind you've known forever and makes your heart feel so good to see again? Every time we see each other (which sadly is every few years), it's like we pick up where we left off. Love you, Rach!

** And now I am done with travelogues for a while. You're welcome.

A Tropical Christmas

If I'm still within a month of the holiday, it's not too late to post about, is it?

This year my side of the family planned a trip to the Florida Keys for the week of Christmas. Coming from a place that usually has a white Christmas, we weren't quite sure what to make of it. Luckily it turns out that Christmas is just as magical in a tropical place! It was a bit crazy and hectic traveling across the country with 2 1/2 month-old twins, but I think I would have done just about anything for a change of scenery. After 3 weeks of bed rest and a few months of staying cooped up inside, I needed to get out. The weather was perfect and the company was even better. All in all, I quite enjoyed our tropical Christmas!

Max and Clara just looooooved relaxing on the dock :)

Christmas morning. I love this picture because it summarizes our crazy life and how crazy and disheveled we feel these days. And by disheveled I mostly mean exhausted.

Our Santa babies (Clara got her first doll for Christmas!)

We went for a quick outing on Christmas afternoon. It was windy as heck, but it sure was pretty.

Mister smiles! I just love that face.

The house we rented had some kayaks. Russ loved it.

We drove down to Key Largo (the most southern point of the United States) and watched the sunset. It was gorgeous!

This picture is too funny not to post. Walking through Key West.

My little family at the beach. 

The view from our deck

A snapshot in what our crazy crew looked like on the plane. Needless to say, whoever had to sit by us was less than thrilled. :)

12 Weeks {enter something witty here}

My babies are 12 weeks and will be 3 months this week! WHAT?!?! My first instinct is to say "wow, where has the time gone?" And then I stop and think that these last 3 months are a weird mix of time going incredibly fast... and incredibly slow. I think I've decided the days (and especially nights) are slow, but the weeks and months are fast. I'm not sure if that even makes sense, but it does in my mind.

I constantly battle with myself whether I am loving that they are growing older or that I am sad about it. I think the general consensus is that each new day and week brings a new discovery, ability, or expression that makes my heart melt and brings so much excitement and happiness. And let's be honest, it has been hard. I mean really, really hard. I am more grateful for Max and Clara than I can ever explain, but that doesn't mean having two newborns is any easier because of it.

There have been days that feeding myself deserves a pat on the back. I still haven't really cooked a meal (and I don't think Kraft Mac N' Cheese counts). I have spilt a bag of breast milk twice now, and both times has brought me to tears. Whoever said "don't cry over spilled milk" never pumped exclusively for twins. Goodness. We are still struggling to get sleep, and hence walk around like mega zombies (and NO! twins don't just magically get on the same schedule, since I seem to be asked that almost daily). Anyway, the point is, it's been rough, but it's also been so, so beautiful and wonderful. Max and Clara are my world. I know the future isn't going to get easier per se, but I am pretty confident more sleep can only help. :)

I just love how as these little guys squirm and kick around their little feet turn up like that. It makes me smile.

2013, You Were Great.

2013 was a year of growth - physically (for me at least), literally (we doubled our family!), and figuratively. I learned so much about myself, I grew closer to my Heavenly Father and His plan for me, I learned patience and compassion, and most of all I learned that miracles are real.

The year started with heartbreak and sadness as we had just had a failed IVF cycle (of which we found out the results on Christmas day) and ended in complete joy with our perfect Max and Clara.

Truly, what a difference a year makes. 2014 we are ready for you! I can only imagine the fun, hard, exhausting, amazing times to come!

January - Russ and I did everything in our power to stay positive despite our heartbreak of a failed IVF. We also traveled to Oregon to pay tribute to my amazing Uncle John who passed away from brain cancer. We managed to squeeze in some fun with snowmobiling and other winter activities. 

February - IVF #2!! Call me determined or impatient, either way I wasn't going to be stopped. Onward and forward! 

March - We found out I was pregnant on March 1st and that we were having twins on March 22nd. What a month! Don't worry, we threw in some house projects, including Russ's handmade kitchen island.

April - My first belly picture! Also took a fun trip to Newport beach with my sister and her family.

May - Natalie was married! Such a beautiful day.

June - Russ and I took a fun trip to New York City to see the National at the Barclays center and do some sight-seeing. This trip was pretty darn exhausting (for being 5 months pregnant with twins), but also a ton of fun. We also found out we were having a boy and a girl (beyond thrilled)!

July - Getting HUGE. It was a hot summer, and I mean HOT. I became increasingly less mobile as these twins rapidly grew inside of me.

August - By far the biggest highlight was meeting and getting a picture with Dave Matthews (definitely a lifelong dream). Our island was officially finished. We also had a fantastic vacation at Trinity Lake with my family.

September - I could barely walk by this month. I went into preterm labor at 33 weeks and was sent to strict bed rest to keep these babies inside!

October - Maxwell John and Clara Evelyn came into this world on the 15th. Best day of my life. (We also finished our laundry room, but who cares about that).

November - Lots of snuggles and sleepless nights with our babies. Couldn't have asked for anything more. So incredibly thankful.

December - We blessed Max and Clara at our church at the beginning of the month and spent Christmas in the Florida Keys (post to come)!

8 Weeks!

A miracle occurred as I went to take the twins' 8 week pictures -- they both fell asleep, Max laid his (not so) little head on Clara's shoulder, and he even gave me all sorts of smiles. I was melting and snapping the camera like crazy. These little guys make me so incredibly happy. We are all beyond exhausted and a little frazzled at times, but the joy they bring is irreplaceable.

Their 2 month appointment is in a few days, but I cannot wait to find out their stats. They have both chunked out like crazy. Max is definitely bigger than Clara, but they are both growing like weeds! Other fun advancements include coos and smiles, their ability to follow us (it always cracks me up when 4 little eyes follow me as I leave the room), and 4-5 hour stretches at night! Hallelujah! :)

And their feet. I just can't get enough of these 20 toes! :)

People Say Stupid Things, Pt. 2

I think this is one of my favorite videos right now. I've only been a mom to twins for 8 weeks and I think I've already experienced all of these questions and awkward situations. Just watch.

Before I was pregnant, I had already become more than aware that people say stupid things. It's just human nature. Battling with infertility was hard in itself, but being asked "why don't you have kids yet?" was just pouring salt in the wound. I think one of my favorite comments I had received during this time was "well at least you guys get to make money and buy furniture!" Yes, because furniture fills the void of infertility. Thank you for that. 

Now that I have twins I have experienced an entirely new set of awkward social encounters (as shown in the video above).  I understand that twins are unique and a foreign idea to most moms, but do people have to be so gosh darn NOSY?! Almost every single time I have been out with the twins I have been asked awkward, personal questions. The three below are my favorite.

"Do twins run in your family?" 

...aka "are they natural?" I have come to learn that this is a backwards way of asking whether or not I did infertility treatments to have these twins. Even though I have talked about my experiences a bit on this blog, it doesn't mean I want to re-hash this experience every day in the checkout line with a complete stranger. Infertility is incredibly personal! And so is how children are conceived! I can bet a lot of money that a woman with one baby does not get asked about the details of that child's conception. 

"Are you breastfeeding them?" 

First, why does it matter to you? My children are healthy, happy and fed. It should not matter if they are drinking breast milk or formula, especially since I don't even know your first name. Second, I'm not really wanting to talk about what I do with my boobs all day with you. Pumping? Breast feeding? None of the above? Not really your business, complete stranger.

"Did you deliver vaginally?"

It seems pretty obvious why this is an awkward topic for a dressing room attendant to ask me, but come on! I don't really want to talk about that part of my body right now. Moving on.

Now obviously if we have become friends or acquaintances and are having a sincere conversation these questions aren't so annoying! It's just the sheer nosiness that gets really old. I'm trying to figure out a way of responding to these questions and letting them know I feel uncomfortable without being rude. It's proving to be harder than one would hope. 

Anyway, thanks for indulging my rant. The moral of the story is that, well, people say stupid things. Life goes on! (and here's a picture of these cute little twins just for good measure)